long but happy day.. :)

woke up early today cos i slept early the other nyt.. hahaha :) non-sense! but i really did woke up early, cos im excited! hahaha :) hhmm.. my day started when isay picked me up (gawd! i hope ona won't read this..) after picking me up, we decided to gate-crash at jaja's haus! we forced jaja to come with us to pick the "thing" up, jaja went with us without taking a bath! hahahaha :) e kxe namn, kayo ba nmn ang bulabugin sa bahay at piliting sumama sa makati e! hahaha :) after getting the "thing", we bought some paint, and we got HIGH up to the point that the three of us kept laughing ang laughing.. after awhile jaja got tired and sat on the chair, and i think she fell asleep, cos i was calling her and she wasn't responding.. hahaha :) so funny experience.. we dropped jaja off cos she needs to get dress for her ballet thing at mahatma.. isay and i went to sm and bought a lot of things.. ang saya! :) napagod ako sa pagtawa namin ng sobra sa felt paper!! hahahaha :) kxe merng maayos na felt paper sa top, e sbi ko kay isay, hnap p kme cos it doesnt look good nga.. edi hanap kme ng hanap, natabunan n kme ng felt paper, tas sa aming struggle sa pghahanap, ung unang felt paper pa dn ang binili nmn, panu kxe ung lng tlga pinakamaayos.. hahaha :) we went home at around 3 para mg bihis at pumasok na.. graaciousness! 4:00 kme mgkkita a, i shud be leaving the haus at 3:45, at the span of 45 minutes, i still got the chance to sleep.. hahaha :) un nga lng, instead of leaving the haus at 3:45, i left the haus at 4 na.. thank God there's no traffic, thank you God.. :)

we diddn't do much in school today, we jus had a pre-lab and a little experiment, if i may call it experiment.. hahaha :) super saglit lng tlga.. we got dissmisses early, but isay and i stayed to talk to our thesis adviser regarding our revisions and other stuffs so that we could have our final defense asap! grabe! ang tagal naming nguusap.. mga 1 hr ata.. ang daming kng anu anu.. prng mgkkproblema p ata kme sa data.. :( ngdecide kme to ult kso narealize nmn na ung final defense dpt ngaung december nah, e 3 weeks ung experiment nmn plus one week of acclimatization, kya aion, sitck with the old one nlng kme.. hehehe :)

while we were talking with our adviser, my fone kept on vibrating inside my pocket, someone's calling i thought, so i rejected the call twice.. after awhile it was vibrating again, so i answered the call, it was my ryan.. :) we talked for a little while kxe kinakausap p nmn c ms.amerix tska galit ako saknya.. we had a fight over the fon last nyt.. hahaha :) tas he called ult nung pauwi n kme, galing nga nya tumiming e.. e since galit nga ako, edi wla ako sa mood mkipagusap.. tas binabaan ko p xia ng fon.. pro maya maya lang konti, narealize ko na ndi ko na kaya.. hahaha :) tska aion nga, mahal ko e.. so i texted him to call.. and so he did.. :) tas aion, he asked me kung galit p dw ako, sbi ko ndi na.. tas aion, otei n kme. :) ang funny nga e, niloloko kme ni isay at ja..hahaha :) matagal dn kme ngusap e.. pro un nga, kelangn nya n pasok sa work e.. he's not here in the Philippines.. hhaayy.. love does really finds its way.. :)

your my only reason.. your my only truth.. my sunshine.."

sickness.. :(

i think im gonna be sickk!! waaaahhh!! my head's pounding! huhuhuhuhuhu :( havent studied for endocrinology's long exam.. waaaahhh! haayy.. :(

i woke up and held my fone.. why?! because i need to hear his voice!! i need to call him, though i know his voice mail will answer.. :( its aryt cos he's the one who's talking in his voice mail.. (isay and ja, you know what am talking about..) i do call him evrynight before i go to sleep.. after hearign his voice, i can now doze off to sleep :) sounds really funny and corny, but i am doing that.. :( i miss him so much and i ges to the point that I AM ACTUALLY LONGING FOR HIM.. haayy.. what is this?!?!?!?!?!?! my love for him is less, yes it is.. but my urge of seeing him and talking to him is on its highest peak! i need him?! i don't know what to do now.. :s

i dreamt of him like two nights ago, it was a very beatiful and enchanted dream.. why enchanted?! cos the setting was in a "ball", not the bouncing ball.. haahaha :) a ball full of people dancing to slow jamz.. we were walking, hand in hand, while he's telling me his feelings for me.. :) i dont want to end that dream.. i dont want to wake up and face the fact that, that fairytale wont happen, it really wont.. :( i woke the next day with the my feeling of longingness grew even more.. but what was i gonna do?! nothing.. :(

Reng Decides To..

i woke up at around 9am. i started my day by recalling all the things that i have studied the night before. after recalling them, i decided to study the other handout. after awhile, i got tired of studying, i rested and continued to read the book that i have bought yesterday, "By The River Piedra I Sat Down And Wept".. its a nice book, its a story of two childhood friends who havent seen each other for 11 years, and one day they decided to see each other. they love each other so much but there are some conflicts, though the guy is willing to give up everything for the girl and the girl is willing to learn everything just to be part of the guy's world.. how sweet diba?! :) ohhh, just read it! hahahaha :)

Isay and I were late for embryology, they were already taking the quiz when we arrived. but our teacher, gave us the quiz still.. hehehe :) i got a nice grade though we were late. In my next class, endocrinology, we also had a QUIZ, a FIFTY item ESSAY QUIZ, and he WASN'T around again!! hahahaha :) what's new with Sir Pareja?! :p My last class was Kursong Rizal, we don't have a permanent teacher for this class.. so funny. hahaha :)

Today, i heard from a friend that ryan called them again. i really felt sad, i even cried. i don't know, just can't help my emotions. my tears started to fall, so i went outside my classroom to breathe some air then went to the washroom. i have a lot of questions in my mind, questions that i know only ryan can answer. i don't know what had happened between the two of us, i don't know if i did something wrong or whatever. suddenly he just stopped calling. i like him, 100% but i don't love him 100%. maybe, im just missing him so much. but if he really is not for me, well then, just so be it. if he calls, i'll be really glad, but if he doesn't, still i'll wait, but not forever.

I don't know what to think anymore. its like the world has been so selfish. it sucks, big time! but its aryt, ill get thru, ill get by with me, myself and i by my side. :)


what's the post title about?! hhhmmm... im reading a new book, "Veronika Decides To Die..". changed "Veronika" to "Reng" instead.. hihihihi. :)

* i wanna feel how's it like to be loved and cared for *

new banner.. again! hahaha :)

haller haller! got a new banner, again! but this time, it all by myself.. hehehe :) i got nothing to do.. im waiting for my sister, my baby corwyn and my niece alyanna.. we'll be going somewhere.. i don't know where! hahaha :) that's about it, just want to share with you guys my new banner.. :)

new banner :)

i have a very nice banner noh?! :p gawa yan ng bes ekai ko.. :) at alam ko, gagawan mo pa nga ko ng maraming marami.. hahaha :) tnx so much bestfriend ko.. alabshu alabshu! :) ang ddanda danda tlga :) bukas ko n post ung two pa na nigawa nya.. for now, gotta bounce, billiards lng ako sa PS with matt.. :) to my bestfriend, thankx so much tlga.. :)

hopless romantic.. :)

watched "serendipity" for the nth time when i woke up.. i dont know what has gotten into my mind para watch yung movie na yun.. hahahaha :) yah i know, its my second all time favorite movie next to "city of angels" kxe.. hehehe :) serendipity is so nice tlga.. eventhouhg i've watched it for a lot of times already, i still end up crying! hahahaha :) hopless romantic me.. :) im gonna watch it again tomorrow.. :)

fixed my "kalat papers" here sa house kanina, found lotsa stuffs.. mern akong nakitang mga note wrtings namin ni bes ekai, its so funny tlga nya! kxe i call her sungit ata before, tas she calls me super sungit in return.. hahaha :) tas i found this one note writing with josie naman, its so funny din, i wont share it nah, kinda not for everybody e.. :) tas i found a poem din, im really not sure if its a poem or what.. ill share it to you guys.. its for my someone special.. sna special din sakanya.. huhuhuhuh :,(

-The letter to the one that God has prepared for ME-

Im wondering at this very minute if you are thingking of me, if you like me, or if you are wondering whats taking us so long to find each other. many times i thought i finally found you, only to be disillusioned by the fact that my wait has not yet ended. i get up each morning, hoping, dreaming, and longing to meet you. i am thinking of how we will meet, will it be as romantic as the ones i have seen in movies? or is it possible that i have known you all my life but we have yet to realize that we are meant for each other? oh how i wish you are here right now because you are the only one who has the answers to all my questions. sometimes i ask myself if i have ever really known "LOVE". i dont have the answers to that question either but i believe that, more often than not, we will never really know what love is until we find the right person. you just dont know how often i dream of finally knowing what it feels like to be in your arms. even at this very moment i am imagining how you will simply sweep me off my feet.perhaps i wpuld be drawn to you by your smile, or your eyes, or maybe even how you manage to make me laugh by your silly little ways. i dont really know for sure but i ampraying that God will help me recognize you when the right time comes. i think of all the pain that i have gone thru in the past nad of how much i have cried since i began my search. i just wanted you to know that i find my strength in clinging onto my vision of the beautiful life ahead of me--the life i shall spend with you. in my mind and in my heart i know that you are worth all the pain and sacrifice. after all, the tears have become a part of my life and i believe that they are slowly washing away my flaws so that i would become perfect, not perfect in its true sense, but perfect fro YOU. i wonder if you've been hurt so many times along the journey. but my dearest one, please dont ever give up because IM RIGHT HERE, patiently waiting for you. i assure you that when we finally find each other i would slowly heal those wounds by my love. at night, i would look out my window and stare at the beautiful sky, hoping that somehow you are also looking up and wondering about me. i utter a silent prayer and send all my cries to the heavens above, thinking that in time they would reach you. and when im impatient, i just close my eyes and believe that you are on your way and that you are longing to see me as well. its funny but when i finally fall asleep, it is still you that i think of, for you are always in my freams. it seems that, for now, that is the only place where i can hold on to you, long enough to tell you how much I LOVE YOU, in my dreams you would kiss away my fears and wrap me with your arms of love. and this, all the more, makes me want to wake upand face the new day ahead with the hope that soon enough, you will no longer be a dream but a reality and once again im assured that you are worth the wait. and when that time comes, everything will fall into its place, just as i had dreamed, just as i had believed it would be. by then, i would simply look back and smile at all that i have gone thru, inspite of the pain and amidst the simple joys of life--and i would be very thankful because they all led me to yuo. in the meantime, take care of yourself for me. hold on to our dream and dont even think of letting go. believe in your heart that we will find each other no matter what happens. God has planned the course and its up to us to follow the directions. dont worry, dont be afraid of getting lost, God saw to it that all roads, no matter which one you choose to follow, lead to me..

went to school early today for our thesis' photo documentation, but unfortunately, mang juan threw all our materials already.. poor poor me and isay.. hihi :) what we did was, we went to mercury drug in front of walter mart to buy the cheap materials and have the picture of the expensive materials taken in the store itself.. hahahaha :) we did it for real.. :)

while walking to mercury drug from the parking lot, we passed by "quatro pasos", its a resort inn.. hahaha :) i remembered one conversation with joise, my good friend, about "quatro pasos" and this certain guy named.. never mind! hihihi :) i thought before that "quatro pasos" was "quatro poses".. hahahaha :) nothing lang, just would like to share it.. haha :)

ung letter n ksma dito sa post ko, nitype ko sa fon ko kanina, kxe isesend ko sna kay "ano".. kso napaisip ako ng sobra! hahaha :) takot ako e.. pro in time sesend ko dn yun, malay nyo, after nitong post ko send ko na.. hihihih :)

enough na for today.. ill be posting again tomorrow, and hopefully an new background or layout.. watever.. :) *nyt yah'all*

my 3rd post for the day.. :)

my gawd! what has happend to my PC?! :( cra ata monitor ko.. hahahaha :) ampanget! waaahhh!! :( uhm, just finishd watching regine velasquez and christopher de leon's movie, i dont know what the title is, but its good.. i cried a bit.. ohhh sentimental me.. hahaha :) guess im just that hopless-romantic type! hahahaha :) i like regine's movies.. hehehe :) i like her movie with aga, two of them, "dahil may isang ikaw" and "pangako ikaw lang", i also like her movie with robin "kailangan kita".. hihihi :) i've watched "dahil may isang ikaw" for like more than 5 times.. hahhahaha :) and i always end up sobbing after the movie, ang cute nya kxe tlga e.. kakaiyak.. :,)

ang boring dito sa haus, wla cla parents tas wlng makain.. cool! hahahaha :) sa sobrang boredom ko, nghalungkat ako ng mga drawer sa guest room, tas nakakita ako ng jackstone.. hahahaha :) nglaro ako! mga 1 hr dn ata ako nglalaro e.. it was fun, though masakit xia sa likod! hahahaha :)

hhaayy.. cant sleep again.. :( always! gising ako sa night tas tulog ako sa morning.. anu kya un?! hahahaha :) i hate it.. it gives me headache.. pro, wla ko magagawa e.. hihihihih :) haayy..

gotta bounce nah.. nttmad n ko blog.. mghhnap nlng ako ng ibang ggwin.. :)

yipee!! :)

yipee! yipee!! hehehehe :) i've already figured out how to change my blog titile.. :) yey! i made my own banner.. made three.. but ofcorz, i can only put 1! hahaha :)

kaaliw gumawa ng banner sa Adobe PHotoshop tska sa JASC paint shop pro.. mas otei sa JASC, user friendly xia.. ndi ko lng ma figure out kng panu xia gagawing transparent.. huhuhuhuhuh :( somebody!! help me!! hihihihih :) ill edit my blog next tym.. ill sleep muna ult.. my gawd! 5pm pa class ko! waaahhh! :) until next post..

I Ain't No Drama Queen..

just another.. another.. another.. hahahaha :) i don't know.. read my angel jaide's multiply 2 nights ago, i agree with one of her blog entry, "where are your friends when you need them?!".. :) its like you're stuck with a situation wherein you needed someone to talk to but you can't find any!?! Feeling that everybody's got their own thing, and you never want to bother them at all.. Feeling that they're sick and tired of listening to your dilemmas, they listen just for the sake of you-think-they-are-listening or they-should-be-listening, but the truth is they're not.. hahahaha :)

I ain't no drama queen, its just that sometimes you can't really pass up that kind of feeling. All you can do is shed tears until it rans out, keep things to yourself and learn how to handle things or situations alone. :) Nothing lasts forever, everything and everybody changes, and promises are meant to be broken. But nevertheless, love your family, friends and most of all love those people who have hurt you more than yourself. :)

well, gotta bounce and get some sleep.. hihihi :) *peace out ya'all*

im all out of love?! :)

bkt im all oit of love?! hahahaha :) kxe naman, for the past three days, c veejay, angie at marjay kinukulit ako sa "asawa" ko dw.. c paolo.. hahahaha!! :) c veejay pa ang nangunguna tlga a! it all started wen paolo visited the wake of my uncle.. i didnt know that he was there, tas c veejay pinatawag ako sa brother nya kxe hinahanap n dw ako ng "asawa" ko, e i was doing sumthing pa, so ndi muna ako pumunta kay veejay.. tas after awhile i went down to my other auntie's haus to sit down and watch tv.. tas angie dumating, she was calling me to accompany my "asawa" kilala tatay.. edi pumunta ko dun, pro ndi para samahan xia kundi apra uminom ng water! hahahahaha :) ndi ko tlga xia nipansin (ang sama mo reng! hahaha!) tas narealize ko na wawa nmn kxe ala xia kausap at ksma, so i decided to accompany him, edi cnamahan ko n nga, kwentuhan lng.. tas aftr awhle, dumating n c angie at veejay.. sumiyo! mga pang-asar n mga ngiti! hahahaha :) tas maya maya lng, paolo left na kxe he works sa people support sa makati, tas 11pm-8am uyng shift nya.. wawa nga e.. graveyard! :( tas nung umalis n xia, kng anu anu na pnguusapn nmn ni angie, veejay and ron.. para nga dw ako adik e, tawa kxe tlga ako ng tawa... hahahahaha :) tas dumating c marjay, edi lalong tumindi ang asaran at tawanan... hahahhaaha :) tas kanina eto nnmn cla po! after ng libing, we stayed p sa cemtery to eat lunch.. e nandun dn c paolo.. tas ndi tlga kme msyado ngppnsinan.. nung sa chapel lng nung ni hwakan nya ko sa kamay.. tas nung ngkatinginan kme tas cnbi nya n "ang init".. hahhaahha :) tas nung ngsama kme nla marjay, veejay, at angie sa table, ng asaran nnmn po! hahaha :) tas etong c marjay bgla nlng kumanta ng "because of you, my life has changed....." tas edi tawanan kme.. hahahaha :) tas umalis n c paolo, aminado nmn ako na nititgnan ko xia nung umalis e.. pro ndi ko akalain n ang tagal ko ng nakatitig sa kanilang family.. hahahaha :) tas bglang kunata tong c angie ng "umuwi k na baby".. hahahahaha :) tas sabay kanta ko "im all out of love.." hahahaha :) tas c veejay tawa ng tawa nung cnbi ko n divorce n kme ni paolo.. sbi nya "sa corte n yan.." sbi ko nmn "no nid na kxe the feeling is mutual!!" hahahahahaha :)

tas aion, hanggang sa tym n toh, mgksma kme ni marjay tas kumakanta kme ng "im lying alone, with my head on the fone, thinking of you til it hurts.. i know ur hurt too but wat else can we do?! tormented andtorn apart.." hahahahaha :) haaayy...

haayy.. another lost..

we had tatay's internment today at hertiage park in taguig.. we left their house at around 9 am and arrived at heritage park's chapel at around 9:45 am.. we held a mass there before the internment itself.. the priest that held the mass was our family priest, father glenn.. the chapel was filled with people mourning for the lost of tatay.. after the communion, father glen let some of the family members give their final message to tatay and to those people who mourned with them.. ate blescie, veejay, one of tatay's close friend and i spoke.. i was the first one to spoke.. i read a message from one of tatay's grandson, my nephew gareth.. gareth, wasn't able to come home from the states due to his school.. gareth, wrote a letter for his lolo, a short letter filled with heart-warming messages that made a lot of people shed their tears.. :c the next speaker was ate blescie, the only phrase that i remembered from what she said was "our tatay, was not just a tatay to our family, but also for everybody..".. veejay was the next one who spoke, he made the people cry more, for veejay told everybody what had happened before tatay passed away.. veejay was the one who was beside tatay when he had the heart attack.. the mass ended at 11am, the caskette of tatay was placed in a very nice carraige filled with white flowers and pulled by a white horse.. there were a lot of people who mourned with our family, someone told us that all in all, 105 cars joined the convery of our beloved tatay.. now, he had left us, it is really painful but we have to accept that he is now not with us physically but his spirit and memories will always be alive in our hearts.. Farewell, dear tatay, we will see you again, one sweet day.. you will always be in our prayers..